My three-year-old daughter stuck out her hand and said, "Look at the fly I killed, Mommy.” Since she was eating a juicy pickle at the time, ?I thrust her contaminated hands under the faucet and washed them with antibacterial soap.
After sitting her down to finish her pickle, I asked, with a touch of awe, "How did you kill that fly all by yourself?”
Between bites, she said, "I hit it with my pickle.”

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A salesman talked my uncle into buying 10,000 personalized pens for his business with the promise that ?he would be eligible to win a 32-foot yacht. My uncle agreed.
Well, he won, and a few weeks after the pens arrived, his prize showed up: a 12-inch plastic yacht with?32 plastic feet glued to the bottom.

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When asked for his name by the coffee shop clerk, my brother-in-law answered, "Marc, with a C.” Minutes later, he was handed his coffee with his name written on the side: Cark.