JOKES
A mathematician, a statistician, and an accountant are all up for the same job. The board asks each of them the same section, “What is 100 + 200?”
The mathematician replies, “300.”
The statistician replies, “300, with 95 % certainty.”
The accountant says in a hushed voice, “What do you want it to be?” He gets the job.
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Bahman approaches a sales lady at a store and says, “I would like to buy my wife some nice gloves.”
The sales lady responds, “Well that’s a nice surprise!”
“Yeah it is,” Bahman continues, “She’s expecting a diamond ring!”
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A boy with a monkey on his shoulder was walking down the road when he passed a policeman who said: “Now, now young lad, I think you had better take that monkey the zoo.”
The next day, the boy was walking down the road with the monkey on his shoulder again, when he passed the same policeman.
The policeman said: “Hey there, I thought I told you to take that money to the zoo!” The boy answered: “I did! Today I’m taking him to the cinema.”