A blind man walks into a restaurant with his dog which has keen eyes. He immediately yanks the dog and starts to spin him in the air like a lasso.
The waiter freaks out, "What are you doing?!?!”
The blind man replies calmly, "Oh, just having a look around.”
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A cowboy strolls into town on his horse "Fireball” and goes straight to the saloon. He drinks a few beverages for a few hours, never moving except to take another one. When he’s done he gets up and walks out of the saloon.
He immediately runs back in and yells, "Alright! Who took Fireball?” But nobody makes a noise.
He continues, "Okay, I’m gonna give y’all to the count of three then we’re gonna have a repeat of what happened back in ‘71.”
"ONE!” He pauses and nobody moves a muscle.
"TWO!” Everybody braces for impending doom.
"Here it comes... THR...”
He is interrupted by a man in the saloon, "Wait! It was just a joke mister. Your horse is right out back... By the way, what’d you do in ‘71?”
The cowboy looks him dead in the eye and says, "I had to walk home.”